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Nerd Chat Line - SNL

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The Exclusive Connections spokeswoman (Paris Hilton) says they know what kind of guy calls a sex line at 1 am: nerds! Whether the nerd likes Star Wars, Star Trek, or Hobbit, they have the girl. [Season 30, 2005] #SNL Subscribe to SNL: https://goo.gl/tUsXwM Get more SNL: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live Full Episodes: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-liv... Like SNL: https://www.facebook.com/snl Follow SNL: https://twitter.com/nbcsnl SNL Tumblr: http://nbcsnl.tumblr.com/ SNL Instagram: http://instagram.com/nbcsnl SNL Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/nbcsnl/
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Text Comments (498)
Hellwyck (2 days ago)
Leia's been lookin' for love in Alderaan places!
Hellwyck (2 days ago)
Tina Fey as Leia Organa... Happy xmas!
Craig Girard (6 days ago)
Ummm, it's a 20 sided die for a saving throw. How did Fey screw that up?!?!?!?!?!
:3 ILikeCats (11 days ago)
I only understood one of these lines
_myth5 media (11 days ago)
Level 8 dungeon master LOL
Lily Barbier (11 days ago)
Pregnancy necessarily assumption guard economy uncertainty hers attractive sense exception desire.
Gilbert Thomas (12 days ago)
Monks can't use vorpal swords without a serious penalty to their THAC0 scores , that would be such a boner killer!!!
Phoebe Congloebe (12 days ago)
But what if I like Marvel and DC? Or Nintendo? Who do I call?
Luis Ortiz (12 days ago)
Paris Hilton ? What no talent bitch ,she is not even “HOT” \Am surprise she can read
Tobi Makkura (13 days ago)
Huh, now I know how frustrated D&D players are when people spoof it... The DM doesn't have a level :P
Ed F booboo (15 days ago)
Why would they need to be dressed up on the phone?
Darquanda Mhmm (16 days ago)
This is a skit
Darquanda Mhmm (15 days ago)
Ed F booboo literally
Ed F booboo (15 days ago)
Really?
John C John (18 days ago)
Fandoms were so few back then. Waiting in for part 2 when when Nerd line becomes an MNC.
husky fluffers (19 days ago)
I'm a level 9 arcane mage with level seven battle magic
Robert Aronin (20 days ago)
Tina Fey missed a great opportunity to wear a gold bikini on national television.
rachelkawaii (20 days ago)
Is it weird if I get all the references here?... dang it im weird
Jax the Ripper (23 days ago)
This needs to be a thing
soloist (23 days ago)
Guess there wasn't a lot of nerds in the audience that night...
Tracy Lilly (26 days ago)
Tina Fey is SO hot as Princess Leia.
My dog on YouTube (28 days ago)
Why do I fill like this is a thing
Nevalith (28 days ago)
As a nerd i was so going to be "Awww yeeeaaa baybee."...but Like..why did they assign a level to the DM, what class was the CE Half-orc, and one does not cast a saving throw...also..wait a d12..S'poosed to be a d20...also ! *pushes up glasses* *NERD INTENSIFIES*
Jerry Robles (29 days ago)
I don't watch anything with Paris Hilton , bhad babbie or Kim Kardashian in it.
aaron laluzerne (30 days ago)
And yet no Asian girls to pretend to be Anime Waifus :(.
Nikhil Kenvetil (1 month ago)
480p man? Really?
Alan (1 month ago)
I'm a paladin with 18 charisma and 97 hit points. I can use my helm of disintegration and do 1d4 damage as my half-elf mage wields his +5 holy avenger.
Mindaugas Mazrimas (1 month ago)
Hilton read the cards like a pro
ShinRyojin (1 month ago)
SNL predicted cosplay patreon.
wratched (1 month ago)
Level eight dungeon master? Come on. The first thing you should know about appealing to nerds is get your terms right.
Suicide Silence (1 month ago)
Hmmm, Paris Hilton playing a skank. That must’ve been a stretch for her........
byron2521 (1 month ago)
You don't think this would get nerds to call? I bet it really would.
Bob Toad (1 month ago)
I used to hand out with these guys and then I grew up.
Dellaluna13 (1 month ago)
“Would you care for a Jelly Baby, baby, or would you prefer I Dalek your balls?” “Oh keep going....I’m ..I’m ...I’m regenerating into Peter Davison!!”
Aniket Giri (1 month ago)
Who is the fat guy at 1:45? Maya almost lost it there.
Donald Hill (1 month ago)
haha there is a job Paris Hilton is qualified to do... lol
Emma McMahon (1 month ago)
But... no harry potter?
Ed F booboo (15 days ago)
That's for kids
Dominique Dixon (1 month ago)
Maya breaking 😂😂😂
TheZephyrStorm (1 month ago)
Everyone is chaotic evil or chaotic neutral. No one ever wants to be good
samuel maloney (1 month ago)
Wow, SNL writers are lazy. Why do people like this show?
Carla Lindholm (1 month ago)
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mistrooth (1 month ago)
Maya Rudolph 100%!!!!!
Stephen E (1 month ago)
What pathetic dorks! Who would, oh wait - did you say TARDIS?? Dalek! I'm taking out my sonic screwdriver! Allons-y!!!
ElPayasoMalo (1 month ago)
1. Dungeon masters don't have levels. 2. What the hell is +5 to melee range? 3. You don't "cast" saving throws. 4. Saving throws are not determined with a d12.
alliance navy 45 (1 month ago)
why isn't there hot line for nerds
Sean Freeman (1 month ago)
paris hilton is a joke.
Loved Maya Rudolph's impression of Nichelle Nichols' Uhura — don't think I've ever seen anyone do an accurate version of her on a parody before. And certainly didn't ever think I'd ever see Paris Hilton doing Fourth Doctor cosplay! 🤪
Sabrina Kowal (1 month ago)
everything works in this sketch lmao
Paul Wilkinson (1 month ago)
Ok but Maya looks good.
FilimboUK (1 month ago)
I think I just assembled the Key to Time
I Lauran (1 month ago)
:)))))
Judy Carter (1 month ago)
"I'm giving myself the Vulcan Nerve Pinch right now!". Hahaha. .omg..that kills me every time!!!!
BDiaz (1 month ago)
Funny sketch except Paris Hilton is completely dead behind the eyes
imogenbegins (1 month ago)
Paris did such a great job <3
Dmajor Wolfy (1 month ago)
WHERE'S THE NUMBER
Michael Salisbury (1 month ago)
stupid everyone knows a druidic monk cant use a vorpal blade :)
M K (1 month ago)
Paris was actually GOOD!
Warren Gee (1 month ago)
Paris sounds like a pro....
mercurywoodrose (1 month ago)
they got the nerd cred right. see guys, all the lines a gal gives you to turn you on: they can read your mind. stop wanting that. try reading theirs. youll fail but they will find it a turn on anyway.
Daniel Cowlin (1 month ago)
Cast it, cast it! Hahaha, may all your rolls be 20's and may the force be with you and don't take Bantha fodder from no trifling Romulan.
James Mac777 (2 months ago)
That is the thing about science fiction and fantasy publishing, they do strange sex to create strange characters, and they have always done this.
Atria Wulf (2 months ago)
OMG they even made a 4th doctor reference
K. Nakanishi (2 months ago)
This was a joke. But now Overwatch is going to be on ESPN, so....
Cheeze Ballz (2 months ago)
"Plus five melee range"? That makes no sense. Melee attack has no range. It's the opposite of a range attack.....duh!
TheWorker (2 months ago)
Horatio was damn good at throwing people off in his scenes.
Joey Tansey (2 months ago)
Paris Hilton actually acted fairly well in this, the last bit was a little flat but i was suprissed!
RedDragonM1 (2 months ago)
Wow. Hilton has gone down as one of the WORST hosts on the show...I can see why. Yikes. Oh, and this sketch can go RIGHT to hell. SNL writers don't go to cons, I see. Let's see.....1. More and more women are going to cons. 2. Many of these women are lovely! 3. There are also plenty of handsome men at the cons....some of which look like they can bench press football players. 4. Some of my most geekiest friends are magnets for women (one of them is really humble about it. But women love him!!).
Gordon Kidd (2 months ago)
Harsh danger corporate formal elevator tremendous dry age compound nut.
Rosemary Williams (2 months ago)
l miss Paris on t.v.
Anon Ymous (2 months ago)
I don't get this at all. Why would any of the nerds calling in be enticed by Paris Hilton as the spokesperson since she's only hot to normal people?
DeepFriedAbortion (2 months ago)
Why they got storm lookin crazy in the back?
Eric B (2 months ago)
I’d legit call this if it really existed 🤫
luvzlara (2 months ago)
“Vulcan” Pinch!!!! Yes!!! Lol
DANGEROUS COMEDY (2 months ago)
Listen to how the audience stops laughing when Paris talks. She is so unfunny.
Mr. Llama (2 months ago)
“Let me do something logical to you baby”-I just died.
Junkers in Tutus (2 months ago)
+5 Melee range?! Stretch Armstrong?
William Tornquist (2 months ago)
Sometimes jokes like these, you see them on the Big Bang sometimes and you saw Shatner do one earlier on SNL that degraded nerds. These seem to me to be almost cheap shots, if they were done at any other people in society I believe there would be a little bit of an outcry.
alex morales (2 months ago)
Didn't Tina Fey say that Paris Hilton was the most conceited cunt host she has ever worked with.
Zachary Foster (1 month ago)
Yes
Donald Corrigan (2 months ago)
Psh. Like a monk would ever use a vorpal sword.
j v (2 months ago)
It was worth it just for Tina Fey as princess Leia. crossing the nerd streams! (btw Leia Organa has to be the porniest name in science fiction - second only to some of those Bond girls)
CNN (2 months ago)
Rachael Dratch looks hot lol.
chas ames (2 months ago)
Huh. Seth Meyers is a bad hobbit. Filthy little hobbitses.
Zachary Thax (2 months ago)
That IS sexy!
TheTjoconnor (2 months ago)
has Sanz ever made it through a sketch without breaking?
Mike McGoveran (2 months ago)
It's nice to remember a time when SNL prioritized comedy above their political views. Those days are gone forever.
Gerry Nightingale (2 months ago)
I'm giving myself a 'Vulcan nerve pinch' right now! (Sanz nailed it!!! Sketch was lame until then)
HK_GmbH (2 months ago)
Any body get that she was the 4th Doctor Tom Baker? Like me some Doctor Who.........
Homika (2 months ago)
hmm level 8 dungeon master or level 8 silent magician hmmm jokes
Dorin Ciobanu (2 months ago)
This should be an actual service!
beerfuck (2 months ago)
I'll never get why paris hilton was ever considered "hot". To me, Tina Fey is infinitely more attractive than paris.
Jay Birdy (2 months ago)
Paris is too good at her role....lol
Uni Frog (2 months ago)
Is the wizard person Amy Poheler or Debra Messing?
DMS Dana (2 months ago)
Holy shit, Maya Rudolph looks EXACTLY LIKE Nichelle Nichols! 😮
Petejano (2 months ago)
Paris has always looked like a 45 year old drag queen
mendali (2 months ago)
Monks aren't proficient with vorpal blades. FAKE NEWS
LobsterPuncher (3 months ago)
I got way too any of these references.
Tamu Malone (3 months ago)
First time I saw Maya Rudolph break😂😂😂😂
Bryan Crump (3 months ago)
I wonder if Paris even knew what Doctor Who was until this, lol.
Mandy C. (3 months ago)
ugh. that moment when you realize half the people around you are gonna see Paris Hilton and go "who's that?" lol
Missy Ginn (3 months ago)
There is absolutely nothing pretty about Paris Hilton.
Pangasauras (3 months ago)
Ironically, the nerds are going to find this funnier
Dandilion Daisy (3 months ago)
No one uses the twelve sided die 🤣

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